The Flip Side

Why Mrs. Potts is a better heroine than Belle:

I cast my vote for Mrs. Potts as my favorite heroine. Oh you say she's not on the list? I suppose that Belle is on the list. Well I happen to think that just 'cause Belle is beautiful is no cause to call her a heroine. Compare her to Mrs. Potts. Not only is Mrs. Potts a servant but she's changed to porcelain and her innocent son into a broken teacup! Talk about endurance! Yet does she whine about her lot in life? NO! She goes on and does the very best she can, encouraging others and giving advice. Where Belle is at best a permanent guest waited on hand and foot by magical servants. Where is the heroism in that?

In my next missive I'll tell you why Sebastian should be ruler of the undersea World.

"The Flip Side" is written my my wonderful dad, Brian "Ace" Middleton

(NOTE: It helps to have read my ten reasons why Esmeralda is better than Clopin before reading this)
~Belle 83210~ Hello um... I saw your web page today...I like it and all but there is just one problem and that problem is that...well I'm sorry to inform you of this but Esmeralda is not even close to being better than Clopin!!!!!

10. You see Clopin is smart... do you know how many corns, callouses and bunions Esmeralda has on her feet? They are probably filled with bacteria because there's no telling what was on the street where she was dancing. There could have been a horse passing by who couldn't hold it any longer and, well, you get the picture...
9. I think the sound of bells sounds much much better than corny feet slapping the pavement!!!!
8. Esmeralda doesn't threaten to hang people but she does threaten to chop different body parts off of people *G*
7. What do you want Clopin to do dress in drag and go shake his butt at some soldiers?
6. Well maybe cause Esmeralda isn't a puppeteer...She's a dancer remember??
5. Well if she sings better then him then how come she has one song in the movie and Clopin has what? four songs!!!!!
4. Sure she has three guys after her but did you ever stop to look at those guys... One is a Hunchback, the other guy is old, wrinkly, has a long nose, and wears a truss and last and definitely least...Phoebus, sure, may look better then the other guys but, well, you obviously haven't read the novel by Victor Hugo where Phoebus just uses Esmeralda for one thing and I'm sure you probably know what that one thing is and treats her the next day as if he doesn't even know her, he even lets her hang and doesn't care!!!!!
3. Clopin's got better things to do and what do you know she gets hanged for it (refering to the book again)
2. Well, you see, that's where you're wrong... Clopin wasn't a main character...of course he's not going to have as many parts as the character with whom the story is all about!!! But do you realize that just because he's not a main character doesn't stop him from having more fans then Esmeralda!!!
1. There you are definately wrong... The whole time Esmeralda is in the Cathedral what is she trying to do??? Oh my gosh could it be that she is trying to get her and her calloused feet back to that sewer that she calls home...

Oh, one last thing Esmeralda is just a Gypsy... There's that one special word after Clopin's name that makes him so much better then Esmeralda besides the fact of all the statements I claimed above and many more is that he is the gypsy KING!!!!!
Bye!!!! for now anyways...
Your Gypsy "Friend", Irea Trouillefou, Queen of the Gypsies

Top 10 Reasons Why Terk is Better than Jane

10) She doesn't go around in a 200 pound yellow frilly dress and try to sketch animals in the jungle.
9) Terk has her own song, and a fantastic one it is, too!
8) Terk knows that whenever you say "It can't get any worse than this" it always does. She never says that in the movie, does she?
7) Terk is any easy-going girl, no fuss and feathers about her! ("He has no respect for personal boundaries!"-from Jane)
6) Being someone's best friend is better than being their sweetheart any day!
5) I'd rather be a gorilla than look like Jane!
4) Terk doesn't go around in a skirt with a thigh-high slit in it.
3) Terk has an unmanagable name- Terkina- but she can get a cool nickname out of it!
2) Terk is a tomboy, better than a prissy little British girl fresh out of 'Finishing School'
1) Terk doesn't run to 'daddy' at a drop of a hat!

Written by Miskastasia

Why Batty Koda is a little better than Crysta

I think Batty is better than Crysta (not that she doesn’t deserve to be on the Heroines page-she does-but-). He is braver than she is she heads off to Mount Warning out of curiosity, unaware of what she’s getting into. He tags along just to protect her, knowing full well the danger of her plan. When Zak admits to his part in the rainforest destruction, Batty is the only one to forgive him. Everyone else, including Crysta, turns on him. So, there are a couple of reasons he’s a smidgeon better than she is.

Submitted by Twinstar

Why the three fairies are better than Aurora:

It is evident from the outset of the film Sleeping Beauty that our dear Princess Aurora is not the most autonomous, proactive heroine ever to grace the silver screen. In fact, she is a completely passive participant in events which she finds herself the center of yet effects in no way whatsoever. (At this point I ask for indulgence from all Sleeping Beauty fans. I love This movie, but I could not resolve it with my post-modern feminist background, until now...) So if this movie is viewed as a film in which the heroine is Princess Aurora, it poses a poor example to girls today of being proactive and independent. However, if you view the heroines of this film as the three good fairies instead, then it sends a very strong, pro-female message! Consider: *Flora, Fauna and Merryweather are well-respected for their magical talents (not physical appearance or any other such superficial qualities) and as such are given honor and prestige with the royal family, to the point where the King and Queen will allow them to take their only daughter away. *They are intelligent. Recognizing that the King’s plan, to burn all spinning wheels, is ludicrous and ineffective, they formulate their own.*They are the instigators of the action in counter to Maleficent, by softening the spell first, then by secluding the princess and putting the kingdom to sleep eventually. Even Prince Phillip, the Hero, does not do as much in furthering the plot.*Finally, who broke the Prince out of the dungeon? Who made his escape from Maleficent’s Lair possible? And who enchanted his sword that 'Evil die and good endure'? It was all the good fairies. I propose, therefore, that this film is less about a vacuous princess and her prince than it is about a power struggle between 3 little old ladies and an old crone (who is cool). When it is viewed in that light, the entire feminine gender comes off empowered. Thanks for listening to my rant. I really enjoyed my visit to your webpage and felt inspired!-Jane

13 Reasons Why Wiggins is better than Pocahontas

{Note: Although I do like Wiggins better than Pocahontas, this is for entertainment purposes only (and probably I will be the only one who’ll get any entertainment from this at all:-)).}

1. He is a sidekick; therefore he has none to make trouble.
2. He sings but keeps it to a minimum. He doesn’t make us sit through two solos.
3. Little swirls of colored leaves are not constantly swirling around him.
4. He doesn’t make friends with the enemy.
5. He doesn’t fall in love.
6. He doesn’t risk his life to save a guy he barely knows.
7. He is loyal, faithful and obedient, unlike Pocahontas.
8. He doesn’t lie.
9. He doesn’t ask friends to lie for him.
10. Unlike Pocahontas, he plays it safe. You won’t catch him white water canoeing.
11. He creates interesting hedge designs.
12. He doesn’t get anyone killed.
13. He doesn’t jump off of cliffs.

From Macaroni

10 Reasons Why Sebastian is better than Ariel

10. He lives in the sea and is proud of it! 9. He knows that when King Triton says "NO," he means NO!8. If Ariel was so called the main character, then why does he have 3 or more songs and she has 1.
7. Who's the one who told Ariel not to go on land, who tried to cover for her when she was lying to her Dad, who plays the music for all of the songs-even his, who tried to make the Prince kiss her, and finally, who risked almost being cooked for dinner just to help her get closer to the Prince? Think about it!?!6. He already had LEGS so he didn't need Ursula.
5. She has red hair, he IS red! Red is for TRUE ROYALTY!4. Sebastian at least knows what a fork is!
3. He knows how to make a rhythm to each of HIS songs!
2. He knows that lying to get out of trouble is not the BEST WAY! 1. He doesn't lose his voice over a man/woman!

Contributed by Waltina M. Currie

Top 10 Reasons Why Mushu is better than Mulan

1. He can make porridge, with cute smiley faces
2. He is loyal, but has a sweet side
3. He can ride down an avalanche on a shield
4. He wears an apron, when cooking
5. He doesn't lie
6. He's concerned over Mulan, and keeps bugs out of her meal
7. He is daring enough to light a huge dynamite rocket thing on his back
8. He doesn't change the sound of his voice every 2 minutes
9. He doesn't annoy mean matchmakers
10. He can use gongs to climb statues

Contributed by Dizzneyman

Why Audrey is better than Helga

1.Audrey has a cool name! The name Helga sounds like a big opera singer.
2.Audrey doesn't wear spagetti straps that go down low and one off the straps always hangs over down her shoulder.
3.Audrey is the first to join Milo after he gets punched down by Rourke. Helga goes with Rourke the whole movie.
4.Audrey is not pushy and bossy, trying to get people to listen to her, like Helga.
5.Audrey has a purpose on the journey unlike Helga, who's just there as second in command.
6.Audrey is the one to invite Milo around the fire with the rest of them. Helga seems to regret his presence the whole journey.
7.Audrey doesn't get thrown off the edge of an airballoon in the end of the movie. She lives.
8.Audrey has to put up with Cookie and his "all 38 states" of the USA tatoo in Atlantis wandering around the city. Let's see Helga deal with that without yelling or kicking someone.
9.Audrey has a cool hat and hair cut.
10.Audrey loves her father anough to save up money to buy a second garage for him. Who knows about Helga's parents.(She probably ran away from them.)
11.Audrey can put up with people complaining to the point where it drives her crazy. Helga from the start would say shut up, or be quiet, or something else that maybe rude.

by someone known as Audrey Ramirez (what a shocker)

Why Tiger Lily is better than Wendy

12. Tigerlily is a princess. Wendy is a white nobody.
11. Tiger Lily has a cuter voice than Wendy. Even though her voice is only really heard when she says "HEL-*gurgle*", it's much better on the ears than one sentence out of Wendy's mouth...
10. She has a cool wardrobe that she can be proud of, which would be a nicely made dress from .... most likely a deer, and a pretty cool feather, which looks simply SMASHING with the dress. Wendy gets stuck with a blue nightgown and a simple bow hair thingie...
9.Tigerlily is younger than Wendy and is much more mature.
8. Tigerlily knows exotic dancing! Sure Wendy can sing, but can she do EXOTIC DANCING?
7. While Wendy only told stories of Peter Pan, Tiger Lily was in the same world/ dimension/ land as him, so they possibly could've been friends for a long time.
6. Her dad is a chief! He's got a cool voice that booms, and he can produce dust when dancing! (though Wendy has some pride in having her father's voice being Captain Hook's as well, did we forget that Hook is the villian?)
5. Tiger Lily is a cutey pie! Wendy is... blue.
4. Tiger Lily looks like Wednesday from The Addams Family. How cool is that?
3. Wendy is knows she's not that great a heroine compared to Tigerlily and so she calls her tribe savages! and RED SKINS! Oh, the HORROR!
2. Tiger Lily is not a racist little.... " nice lady"
1. Tigerlily doesn't whine, gets carried off by Peter Pan while Wendy has to fly behind, she's a respected individual, and most of all, SHE'S CUTER THAN ANYONE ELSE IN HER TRIBE! Doesn't that say something?

Contributed by Zoe M.

Why Genie is better than Jasmine

The Genie is a lot cuter than Jasmine.
The Genie has a sense of humor unlike Jasmine.
He sings a song that at least has a beat to it.
He has two solos and Jasmine only has a duet.
He can do magic.
Jasmine gets angry all the time.
He doesn't lie to the sultan.
He never tries to sneak out of his home.
The Genie has a lot better wardrobe than Jasmine: A Hawaiian Shirt, Goofy hat and a camera!

Submitted by

Why the dwarves are better than Snow White

1. The dwarves don't go into strange houses they find in the woods.
2. They live like slobs and are proud of it too.
3. They actually work for a living.
4. Each one one of the dwarves warns Snow White about being careful...does she listen? I think not.
5. The little guys don't kick people out of their own fact they gave Snow White their beds. She made them sleep in the sink (well that was just Doc, but still).
6. Speaking of beds...Snow White took up seven beds, while each dwarf took up only one bed.
7. The dwarves don't fall in love with some freak that starts singing in the courtyard.
8. They don't run around getting scared of "faces in the trees".
9. Everyone loved Snow White...she was perfect. The dwarves had their flaws, in fact their names were their personality.
10. Finally, the dwarves didn't sing/talk in opera voices every time they opened their mouths.

Submitted by Rose Red

10 reasons why Devon and Cornwall are better than Kayley:

10) They have a sense of humor.
9) They only talk when they need to or are alone.
8) Don't say stupid things (ex. "Garrett, why don't you look at me when I'm talking to you?")
7) They don't constantly complain about how "boring" or "honorless" their lives are.
6) They don't mention their mother every 10 minutes.
5) They "know" things.
4) Can handle themselves when put in a difficult situation.
3) Have a way better song.
2) They can breathe fire and fly (at the end)
1) Don't talk incessantly.

Submitted by Chika

10 Reasons Why the Stepsisters are Better than Cinderella:

10) They don't have a dodgey haircut.
9) They don't have much luck, life for them is a struggle.
8) They don't hang around with mice and birds - GADS! think about the diseases!
7) It's not their fault Cinderella works for them - do you ever see her complaining? I think I would!
6) Life for them is unfair, how come Cinderella gets the guy, how do the sisters not deserve it?
5) They can't sing but at least they don't sound doped!
4) What sort of geek would make little outfits for mice and birds? Seriously!
3) Cinderella's dress was ruined by the sisters but it's her fault - the materials were stolen!
2) Cinderella put a mouse in the teacup, ok maybe it got there but how would you like it?
1) They aren't cheesy and don't wear slippers with little hearts on them - what age is she? three?

By Jemma, Odette's biggest fan ;)

Why Donkey is better than Fiona

1) He liked Shrek from the very beginning...became friends with the heart not the looks like Fiona.
2) He didn't go around killing little innocent birds.
3) He can sing.
4) He is always loyal.
5) He hooked up with a DRAGON (dragons rock!).
6) He didn't lie in a bed, helpless forever.
7) He's a better comedian (all his lines were totally awesome).
8) His offspring were ADORABLE.
9) He's a lot better looking than Fiona.
10) His song choices were perfect.
Submitted by Megan and Molly

Top Ten Reasons Why Hera is better than the Muses

10.Hera's dress is sparkly(the muses just wear boring ole' white!)
9. Hera's hair style is SO cooler!!
8. Hera's got power!!!!(she's the Queen of Olympus!!!)
7. Hera doesn't sing EVERY time we see her!
6. Hera's hair is sparkly (like her outfit)!
5.Hera doesn't dance EVERY time we see her!
4.Hera doesn't interrurt Meg while she's singing!
3.Hera's skin is pink!!!
2.Hera doesn't talk to an invisible narrator.
1. Her son is Hercules!!!!(the star of the movie!!!!)
--by Jasmine

Why Bartok is better than Anastasia

He has a better sense of humour.
He knows when things are looking bad and when to abandon a situation (Anastasia: hey let's go towards the eerie green light!!! Surely nothing BAD could be there!!!)
He's cuter.
He gets a girlfriend right away and doesn't punch her in the face (men are such babies)
He can point out the obvious and not sound totally ditzy
He can dance better.
He's not afraid of Rasputin and stands up to him a few times.
You gotta love his ears!!!!!
He fights (well kinda...he did say he would though!!! "ill give her a WHA!!! and a HIYA!!! and a WHOOWA!!!!" lol so adorable!!!)
and most importantly:
He's a sidekick!!!! They never get hurt!!!! and he can fly!!!

Submitted by Sawyer

Want to let off some steam against a heroine? Think the sidekicks are better than the leading ladies? Write an article for the Flip Side and send it to me. A few rules--I ask that it be one character against the heroine of the same movie. Also, I reserve the right to pick and choose what I like--so write funny!